


why i hate loving you

by Ro_Mona



Category: Asagao Academy: Normal Boots Club
Genre: Angst, Crying, Jealousy, Love, Men Crying, Sad, Sad Ending, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Unrequited Love, vent - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-12-13 22:28:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21005186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ro_Mona/pseuds/Ro_Mona
Summary: Jeff loves Austin.Austin loves Hana.Jeff hates himself.





	why i hate loving you

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this really quickly so it might not make any sense

Jeff sat alone in his room. Caddy had gone off to argue with Ian or something, Jeff didn’t really know, and he didn’t really care either. Sure he was the ‘mom friend’, the leader, the person responsible for Hidden Block’s safety, but he was tired, and he had other things on his mind, other  _people_ on his mind. Well, actually, just one other person. Austin.

The more he thought about Austin the more he thought about Hana. The more he thought about the two of them the more he wanted punch a hole in the wall. 

Jeff felt selfish. Austin was just a tall guy with brown hair and a goofy smile. Hana was just a bubbly girl with pink hair and a kind heart. They were perfect for each other and they were quite obviously happy together, so why did Jeff want them separated?

Austin was his best friend, so why couldn’t Jeff be happy to see his best bud happy? Isn’t that how friendship is supposed to work? 

Friendship . That was the problem. Jeff didn’t want friendship, he wanted love,  _real_ love. A deep and passionate and romantically intimate love. He wanted  _Austin’s_ love, but Hana was taking it all.

Hana was a greedy bitch. Jeff slapped his own wrist. How dare he think that of her? Hana was a sweet, kind, compassionate and caring individual, and Austin deserved her, and she deserved Austin.

Jeff stood up, walking slowly towards the window, opening it up and leaning on the window sill, staring out at the people below. 

There was Caddy and Ian bickering, Luke and Jimmy talking. Jon with Jacques, staring at the trees. 

The trees.

Under one of the trees was two people. Austin and Hana. Jeff knew he shouldn’t be looking, it would just make him hate himself more, but he couldn’t help but let his gaze linger.

As he watch the two smile and laugh and stare lovingly at each other, his heart sank into his stomach. He felt his eyes start to water, and his cheeks becoming hot, but he still couldn’t look away. Then they kissed. Jeff slammed the window shut and whirled around, leaning against the wall and grabbing his shirt as though his heart was about to break. He slowly slid down the wall, breathing heavily and trying not to cry.

Once he reached the floor he rested his forearms on top of his knees and hung his head, finally allowing himself to break down.

Austin was happy and Jeff wasn’t. Austin loved Hana and not Jeff. Jeff had to accept that. He had to accept that he wasn’t enough for Austin. He had to accept that he just wasn’t what Austin wanted or needed in a partner. He had to accept that he’d never be right for him. 

And that was okay. Jeff could handle that, he could handle seeing them kiss, he could handle hearing Austin talk about how much he loves Hana, he could handle Austin thanking him for being such a great friend. He could handle every painstaking moment of it. He would live, and he would move on,  _because it just be like that sometimes._


End file.
